LivingTodayInThePresent

Harrassed. Giddy. Teetering on the brink of insanity–three emotional states I’ve been in the past few weeks. I’ve only recently began to vent via writing and now as you can see, I’ve joined the fray and started a blog.

Work’s always been cake to me but now I feel as though I’ve swallowed three different kinds and am drowning in mocha, coffee crumble and chocolate fudge. I love it but it’s killing me!

Every morning as I wake up, it’s with half-dread, half-anticipation. Will things finally push through? Will plans be solid this time around? Will an obstinate client finally relent? Will I be finally able to relax & breathe and not rush madly from day to day as though chased by crazed dogs?  I dream about work too, and it’s pretty terrifying to be waking up at 3AM mumbling about packages and ads and road shows and ASFs.

So now here’s the dilemma (as if work isn’t bad enough)– I get a pretty good choice. It’s a step above in all ways and they seriously want me and I’m of half a mind to take it. But what’s stopping me? Loyalty? Convenience? Affection for the people around me?

I don’t know, perhaps all three but I feel as though the offer isn’t right for me. But then again what is? And as mere humans how do we know what’s right for us? Gut? Divine intervention? Instinct? Conscience? I really don’t know and I haven’t the foggiest clue. So if someone does, let me know, because nothing is ever easy.